January 09, 2008
John Vincent Coulter
Printer FriendlyBy: Ann Coulter
The longest baby ever born at the Albany, N.Y., hospital, at least as of May 5, 1926, who grew up to be my strapping father, passed away last Friday morning.
As Mother and I stood at Daddy's casket Monday morning, Mother repeated his joke to him, which he said on every wedding anniversary until a few years ago when Lewy bodies dementia prevented him from saying much at all: "54 years, married to the wrong woman." And we laughed.
John Vincent Coulter was of the old school, a man of few words, the un-Oprah, no crying or wearing your heart on your sleeve, and reacting to moments of great sentiment with a joke. Or as we used to call them: men.
When he was moping around the house once, missing my brother who had just gone back to college, he said, "Well, if you had cancer long enough, you'd miss it."
He'd indicate his feelings about my skirt length by saying, "You look nice, Hart, but you forgot to put on your skirt."
Of course, he did show strong emotion when The New York Post would run a photo of Teddy Kennedy saying the rosary. I can still see the look of disgust. I saw that face in "How To Read People Like a Book" and it was NOT a good chapter.
Your parents are your whole world when you are a child. You only recognize what is unique about them when you get older and see how the rest of the world diverges from your standard of normality.
So it took me awhile to realize that by telling my friends that Father was an ex-FBI agent and a union-buster whose hobbies included rebuilding Volkswagens and shooting squirrels in our backyard, I was painting the image of a rough Eliot Ness type, rather than the cheerful, funny raconteur they would meet.
Besides being very funny, Father had an absolutely straight moral compass without ever being preachy or judgmental or even telling us in words. He just was good.
He would return to a store if he was given too much change -- and this was a man who was so "thrifty," as we Scots like to say, he told us he wanted to be buried in two cardboard boxes from the A&P rather than pay for a coffin.
When I was bombarded with arguments for baby-killing as a kid, I asked Father about the old chestnut involving a poverty-stricken, unwed teenage girl who gets pregnant. (This was before they added the "impregnated by her own father" part.) Father just said, "I don't care. If it's a life, it's a life." I'm still waiting to hear an effective counterargument.
Father hated puffery, pomposity, snobbery, fake friendliness, fake anything. Like Kitty's father in "Anna Karenina," he could detect a substanceless suitor in a heartbeat. (They were probably the same ones who looked nervous when I told them Father was ex-FBI and liked to shoot squirrels in the backyard.)
He hated unions because of their corrupt leadership, ripping off the members for their own aggrandizement. But he had more respect for genuine working men than anyone I've ever known. He was, in short, the molecular opposite of John Edwards.
Father didn't care what popular opinion was: There was right and wrong. I don't recall his ever specifically talking about J. Edgar Hoover or Joe McCarthy, but we knew he thought the popular histories were bunk. That's why "Treason" was dedicated to him, the last book of mine he was able to read.
When Father returned from the war, he used the G.I. Bill to complete college and law school in three years. In order to get to law school quickly, he chose the easiest college major -- a major that so impressed him, he told my oldest brother that if he ever took one single course in sociology, Father would cut off his tuition payments.
As a young FBI agent fresh out of law school, one of Father's first assignments was to investigate job applicants at a uranium enrichment plant, the only suitable land for which was apparently located on some property owned by the then-vice president, Alben Barkley, in Paducah, Ky.
One day, a group of FBI agents saw the beautiful Nell Husbands Martin at lunch with her mother. They asked the waitress for her name and flipped a coin to see who could ask her out first. Father lost the coin toss, so he paid off the other agents. And that's how Nell became my mother.
Mother swore she'd never marry a drinker, a smoker or a Catholic, and she got all three, reforming Father on all but the Catholicism. Even in foreign countries where none of us spoke the language, Father went to Mass every Sunday until the very end.
Of course, toward the end, he probably didn't even remember he was a Catholic. But on the bright side, he didn't remember that Teddy Kennedy was a Catholic, either.
Father spent most of his nine-year FBI career as a Red hunter in New York City.
He never talked much about his FBI days. I learned that he worked on the Rudolf Abel case -- the highest-ranking Soviet spy ever captured in U.S. history -- during one of my brother's eulogies on Monday. But when Father read a paper I wrote at Cornell defending McCarthy and came across the name William Remington, he told me that had been his case.
Father mostly had contempt for Soviet spies. In addition to damaging information, such as military plans and nuclear secrets, the spies also collected massive amounts of utterly useless information on things like U.S. agricultural production. These were people who looked at a flush toilet like it was a spaceship.
He told me Soviet spies reveled in the whole cloak-and-dagger aspect of espionage. One spy gave weirdly specific details to a contact before their first meeting: He would have the New York Herald Tribune folded three times, tucked under his left elbow at a particular angle.
When the spy walked into the hotel lobby for the rendezvous, Father nearly fell off his chair when the man with the Herald Tribune folded under his elbow just so ... was also wearing a full-length fur coat. But he couldn't have told his contact: "I'll be the only white man in North America wearing a full-length fur coat."
In the early 1980s, as vice president and labor lawyer for Phelps Dodge copper company, Father broke a strike against the company, which culminated in the largest union decertification ever -- at that time and perhaps still. President Reagan had broken the air traffic controllers' strike in 1981. But unions recognized that it was the breaking of the Phelps Dodge strike a few years later that landed the greater blow, as described in the book "Copper Crucible."
There was massive violence by the strikers, including guns being fired into the homes of the mine employees who returned to work. Every day, Father walked with the strikebreakers through the picket line, (in my mind) brushing egg off his suit lapel.
By 1986 it was over; the mineworkers voted against the union and Phelps Dodge was saved. For any liberals still reading, this is what's known as a "happy ending."
To Mother's lifelong consternation -- until he had dementia and she could get him back by smothering him with hugs and kisses -- Father wasn't demonstrative. But all he wanted was to be with Mother (and to work on his Volkswagens). They traveled the world together, went to DAR conventions together, engaged in Republican politics together and went to the New York Philharmonic together -- for three decades, their subscription seats were on the highest landing, or as we Scots call it, the "Music Lovers" level.
When Mother was in a rehabilitative facility briefly after surgery a few years ago and Father was not supposed to be driving, we were relieved that a snowstorm had knocked out the power to the garage door opener, so Daddy couldn't get to the car. It would just be a week and then Mother would be home.
My brother came home to check on Father the first day of this arrangement to find that he had taken an ax to the side door of the garage, so he could drive to the rehab center and sit with Mother all day.
When she left him for five days last summer to go to a family reunion in Kentucky, at some point, Father, who hadn't been able to speak much anymore, looked up and asked his nurse, "Where is she?"
And last Friday morning at 2 he passed away, in his bedroom with Mother. The police and firemen told my brother that they kept trying to distract Mother to keep her away from the bedroom with Father's body, but she kept padding back into the bedroom to be close to him.
Now Daddy is with Joe McCarthy and Ronald Reagan. I hope they stop laughing about the Reds long enough to talk to God about smiting some liberals for me.
Posted by redguy at January 9, 2008 09:52 PM
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Comments
I am very sorry for your loss, Ann, your father was a GREAT man and his greatest accomplishment was you and your brothers.
My parents are hanging on but I feel they don't have very much longer.
Posted by: jim ![[TypeKey Profile Page]](http://www.redstatesusa.com/nav-commenters.gif)
at January 10, 2008 08:47 AM
Ann:
I am sorry for your loss. Your remembrance of your Father will surely make him smile in heaven.
Posted by: 5th Column Hunter at January 10, 2008 09:10 AM
So that's where you came from. It had to be truly wonderful parents to produce you. I am sure your Dad was extremely proud of you and your ideals. I cry with you and share your grief. Losing my Dad 10 years ago is still a painful thought but all the good memories keep me going. God bless your whole family. Linda
Posted by: Concerned Citizen at January 10, 2008 09:13 AM
G-d Bless you Ann. I am so sorry for your loss.
Posted by: DFWDawg at January 10, 2008 09:17 AM
Rest In Peace Mr. Coulter.
What a sweet rememberence and like Gen Patton said, dont mourn that he's passed but cheer that he lived. There are all kinds of conservatives but it's still great to have an old Pappy to shoot the with and get your feet back under you(I can remember phone calls with my dad while I was in airborne school that really really helped). I'll never stop making those calls.
Posted by: playertwo at January 10, 2008 09:24 AM
Ann, Your Dad sounded terrific! He is an exact carbon copy of my own, who I still miss after 29 years. Our prayers are with you and your family. Know this, he is in a better place!
Posted by: iker at January 10, 2008 09:26 AM
God bless you and your family, Ann. We'll be praying for you and the repose of your father's soul.
Posted by: Tonydacrow at January 10, 2008 09:26 AM
I'm truly sorry for your loss.. His free-thinking love of God and country is an inspiration and a blessing.
Posted by: bobh at January 10, 2008 09:27 AM
God bless you Ann. I have experienced the loss and it wasn't easy. At 72 I'm the last of dad's family. I know your dad was extremely proud of you.
Posted by: BWC at January 10, 2008 09:43 AM
As a retired Police Officer married to my childhood sweetheart for 36 years and father of two, I was deeply touched by your words. God Bless.
Posted by: MARKLAND52 at January 10, 2008 09:43 AM
Ann, my deepest sympathies go out to you. As I read the description of your fsther, I thought for a moment that my father (who mercifully died shortly before 9/11)had had a twin brother that was separated from him at birth. He was an oil executive in a local company that my great grandfather started, so I understand the feeling of condemnation without knowledge of circumstances. There are so few good men with those values out there today - it seems that virtue sounds like too much work anymore. To lose a man such as your father is one of the greatest losses that this nation can face. If only it would realize it.
Posted by: Hilltopbabe at January 10, 2008 10:43 AM
Sorry for your loss, Ann. Your article paints a beautiful Technicolor picture of your father.
Posted by: meat at January 10, 2008 10:44 AM
Ann, I join my voice with others in offering you our sincere condolence. As I read your description of your father, I couldn't help but picture my own Dad, who moved on to Heaven nearly 20 years ago. I STILL today talk to him - and miss him sorely.
I'm happy for you that you had such a great father - and surely your Mom is just as awesome!
Now you have a closer friend to talk to God for you! There are times in my life I can "feel" my Dad's presence - at times when I feel I could use his advice, his closeness!
Posted by: Litl Bits at January 10, 2008 11:12 AM
My thoughts are with you as you mourn the loss of your Dad. Being an avid fan of yours for years, I can only assume that some, or much of him rubbed off on you. That said, there is no doubt he was a fine man and a loving father. He is as you say, enjoying the company of some truely great men now. God bless and keep him and may all his worldly strength pass to those who loved him.
Posted by: boyscout55 at January 10, 2008 03:08 PM
B"H May you, your mother, and entire family be comforted. Rabbis teach us the commandment to honor ones father & mother can be fulfilled even after their passing. I believe you have done just that in your lovely remembrance of your father, and continue to honor your parents through your writing and commentary. You send the American People very important messages.
Ya'aqov Ben-Yehudah
Samaria, Israel
Posted by: Ben-Yehudah at January 10, 2008 05:46 PM
Very sorry for your loss, Ann. Your father did well in life. He raised a fine daughter.
Posted by: ArmyBrat at January 10, 2008 07:47 PM
Ann,
I can tell you got your feistyness from your Dad.
Thanks so much for sharing your story about your fine Dad with us.
I had a tough as nails paratrooper jump trainer as a Dad and we were scared to death of him.
He was a tough SOB but a good man and father.
He made sure all of us (5) went to college which he never finished.
My deepest condolences to you and your family.
You hold his spirit
Posted by: kalamere at January 10, 2008 08:48 PM
Ann,
I have been reading your column for several years now and I must say that this one was the most touching and tender. I also lost my dad several years ago and had the privilege of eulogizing him at his church memorial service. It was difficult, but I needed to do so. You have honored your father (and your mother) in a special way. God bless you as you continue to serve the Lord in your influencial way. You have a brother in Orlando, FL.
Chaplain Vincent Joy
Posted by: Vinny at January 10, 2008 09:16 PM
I'm not sure if you see these, Ann, but please accept my condolences on the loss of your father. It sounds like he was a wonderful man, father and husband. Take comfort in the warm and happy memories of his life. May God bless you and your family.
Posted by: The_Kat™ at January 10, 2008 09:49 PM
God bless your dad, your mother and you, Ann. Every time we lose someone of good moral character in this world, it is truly a loss of enormous proportions. Your dad sounds like he was an inspiration to more people than just your family. I will pray for him at Mass on Sunday.
Posted by: BLR at January 11, 2008 09:31 AM
Ann,
I send you and your family my deepest sympathy and prayers on the passing of your beloved father. May he rest gently forever in the presence of the almighty.
Thank you for sharing such wonderful memories of this very special man.
Respectfully,
KM
Santa Monica, Ca.
Posted by: IconoclastKM at January 11, 2008 09:41 PM
I am truly sorry for your loss, Ann.
This is a beautiful tribute to him and to your famly.
I lost my mother in 1997. Though we didn't get along very well, to this day I miss certain things: the way she decorated the house for Christmas; being there to call and share good news, sad news, or just saying hi.
What is going to amaze you (at least it amazes me and still does to this day) is the silly little things that are going to trigger memories - memories long forgotten. Never forget that your father is still with you.
I was with my mother the entire night before she passed in the morning. Her passing was totally unexpected to my entire family.
I got home from the hospital, collapsed on the couch and finally fell asleep after a night of tears and disbelief that ended with her passing.
I was awakened by the feeling of someone slipping their hand into mine and holding it tightly for a second or two as if to thank me.
I live alone so no one else was in my house. I knew then and believe to this day that it was my mother saying thank-you and good-bye for now. Some don't believe in this and maybe you don't either, but I do.
I have other stories involving her after her passing but don't want to go into them.
Just remember that your father is still with you.
God bless you and your family.
Lynn
Posted by: LynnJG at January 16, 2008 09:55 AM
I am so sorry to hear about your loss. I have lost both of my parents in the last two and one-half years. I can only imagine your loss.
It does explain your long, tall frame which causes the liberal women to turn green with envy. Enjoy their bright green hue our long tongues as you continue to wear your mini-skirts.
May G-d comfort you in your time of loss. G-d bless you, Ann.
Posted by: Loser at January 16, 2008 05:18 PM
A beautiful tribute, Ann - may you and your family be comforted by your memories. I, too, lost my father recently and know the emptiness you are experiencing. God bless!
Posted by: CapeConservative at January 16, 2008 08:10 PM
Ann,
There could be no greater tribute to your father, than having you as his daughter.
God comfort you and your family.
Michael
Nashville
Posted by: moorehits at January 18, 2008 12:32 PM
thanks for sharing. He reminds me of my dad who set a good example for his many siblings. He sounds especially devoted to his wife.
Posted by: montrosmark at January 21, 2008 01:20 PM
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